Just prior to him speaking, I met this man at his stall. He pointed to my uterus and told me that it is a portal, a stargate. He then pointed to two old ladies and said their uteri were stargates too (er, with rusty hinges?).
David Boyle is the creator of a conspiracy exhibition in Blackpool. He is a small punchy man. He begins:
‘The children of the stars, angels, gods and sons of gods are all aliens to earth. Our history is a lie. The temple at Abydos, Egypt. Why is there a helicopter and a submarine described in hieroglyphs? We evolved in Sumaria. Marduk the son of Enki. Heaven is the name of Niburu, the planet of the Annunaki.”
(All this information is delivered in a strong northern accent by a bloke with a beer gut and trainers. Imagine Les Dawson expounding on the mysteries of life, it’s quite surreal).
“The queen is the same family tracing all the way back to Sumeria. 43 US presidents. In exchange for giving them a charter of their own, George III, in a naval court…(didn’t catch the rest) America is a private limited company owned by the royal families of Europe.”
Then I’m afraid my notes get very bitty… I start to drop off “doctor who is psychically guided…the worst crime is murder.Where are all the daleks right now? Iraq and Afghanistan. The queen has all of your original birth certificates, and she has lent them out to the IMF, your birth certificates have been mortgaged. The queen tells us to share but when is she going to start sharing? I’m sure you are all here because we want a better world. Divide and conquer, split the world into different countries. Stop believing what other people tell us. Don’t believe in tradition. I had a fantastic childhood. “
Basically, it’s all pale imitation David Icke. I look around to see all these old people (traditionally her biggest fans?) nodding away to the Queen’s a shape-shifter type sentiments.
“Everything that exists is energy.”…really tired.”Sub-atomic particles. There are no straight lines. There are only spheres. Purest form of energy known to man is light but actually it’s love…The key to unlock light is 19 47 which is the latitude of a tetrahedron. 666 is the key to sound.” Shows slide of “crop circle which formed beneath Silbury hill. 16/1/1991…mathematical crop circle. 66 foot one way 67 the other…folding things over gives 19.47…We are being told to work in Pythagorean mathematics. It represents Avebury and Silbury hill. What’s a pyramid? It’s a book in stone. Universal constant is pi. ‘Bury’ means star…as above so below…kabala…Avebury is the flow of life encoded on the ground.”
Sorry but just couldn’t stay awake, Maths at the end of a 2 day conference is not a good idea, he should have been on early morning (The Literacy Hour).
Long drive home ahead of me, so I slip out and make it back to London in 4 hours (does England run downhill from the North?). I meet Ms Puddleduck in Brick Lane for a quick drink before returning to take up my maternal duties.
Photos of the conference will be posted up, when I find the fucking lead to my camera in amongst the chaos…