A selection of Nick Cohen’s articles in various publications to the present day ‘Waiting for the Etonians’ is fucking brilliant. Leafing through it this morning, I have not yet come across a sentence I disagree with.
“Brilliant! That is sooo Tory. I’ve got to come.”
Surprised I said “Really? How is it Tory?”
“Well it’s all about you taking your own resources and using them to start a business. Refusing to kowtow to government regulations. And it’s sharing, community. Toryism is all about loving nowadays.” he replied.
“Are there any conservatives in Hackney?” I ask.
“Oh yes. More and more. Have you not heard of the Queenbridge battle? Where we trounced Labour?”
He explains: “We are ‘red’ Tories as opposed to blue. Who legalised trade unions? Us! We were opposed to Whig policies. We believe in community.”
He expands:”Trouble was the Conservatives have fetishised Margaret Thatcher for the last decade. She was great. But monetarism doesn’t work. All the surrounding men put her on a pedestal rather like they worship the Virgin Mary in Southern Europe. Now with Cameron leading us, that is in the past…”
I interrupt: “But he’s a lightweight isn’t he?”
The Scottish Hackney Tory lowers his voice and says: “Well after yesterday, it’s all different. People will perceive him differently…”
“You mean, the fact that his child has died will give him…” I search for the right word “gravitas?”