Shopping Trip

“Can you buy some salad, we’ve got Trish Deseine and her children *coming over tonight?”
Audible sigh. Barely intelligible mumbling along the lines of ‘I’m sure her kids don’t want salad.’
“What kind of salad?” heaves The Teen.
“Cos or Romain?” I suggest.
“Is that in a bag or in a big ball?” She questions.
Enjoying the mini insight into The Teen’s worldview, I laugh:“It’s in a long ‘ball'”
“I don’t understand.” says The Teen.
I try to explain that it’s the leaves that tend to be used for Cesar salad, her favourite.
“Wait! I’ve seen that. It’s got a long stick on it” she exclaims.
“Er not really.”
“I have to get conditioner too but nobody conditions their hair on Kilburn High Road. I’ve tried so many shops and they don’t have it anywhere.” She grumbles.
“Maybe cos you won’t ask in shops if they have something?”
“They laugh at me.”She says.
“What do you mean, they laugh at you?” I ask, trying to imagine shop assistants laughing at a request for conditioner.
“When I go to Way2Save they laugh at me when I don’t know what ‘coriander’ and (said with an eye roll) ‘flat leaf parsley’ is?”
“They literally laugh at you”
“Yes. It’s obvious I’ve been sent out on a shopping trip by my mum, so they laugh.”
“Do you now know what ‘coriander’ and ‘flat leaf parsley’ looks like?”
She snorts: “No. And I’m not interested. When I’m older, I’m NEVER HAVING PARSLEY EVER”
She takes my card and goes off to Kilburn High Rd.

*cancelled. They probably heard about the salad.