• Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • Snapchat
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
  • Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

MsMarmiteLover

  • Food
    • Recipes
    • Vegetarian
    • Vegan
  • Travel
    • France
    • Italy
    • Spain
    • UK
  • Wine
  • Gardens
  • Supperclubs/Events
  • About
    • Published Articles
    • Books
  • Shop
    • Cart

Out there

November 9, 2008 7 Comments Filed Under: Uncategorized

I did know that adoptive mothers can eventually breast feed, after much patience. Weirdest thing I have learnt this week: transsexuals can breast feed (link). I found this out from a BDSM site where a slave who had never been pregnant wanted to lactate for her master. She wanted to be “like a good little cow”, a “farmyard animal” and was seeking a breast pump such as they use on small animals for the purpose.

BDSM (Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission/Sadism, Masochism)  site’s like InformedConsent or SeekDiscipline are a window into a very strange world. The denizens are called ‘Master’, ‘Sir’, ‘Lady’ or ‘Mistress’. Slaves are registered and referred to in most cases only by number. The number is sometimes tattooed upon their bodies, a clear acknowledgement of concentration camp victims and branding in slavery. Slaves frequently seek permission from their dom in order to post. 
The ‘dom’ (male) or ‘dommes’ (female) have names. The use of the term ‘master’ or ‘mistress’ is hotly disputed. Many say that it is an honorific title that should only be used for the dom/domme that owns you, otherwise it is impertinent.
If slaves are obedient and pleasing they are ‘collared’, sometimes in a publicly witnessed ceremony, and ‘owned’. Similar to marriage in our vanilla world, but the commitment is much greater. 
People who like to do both are called ‘switch’. There exist many distinctions in this finely tuned hierarchy; the difference between tops and dominants, subs and bottoms. 
A slave that is dropped by his/her master must suffer greatly, above and beyond the usual heartbreak. Thinking of my one session at Co-dependants Anonymous, surely the people who attend these are just Co-dependants with no one adequate to depend on. The BDSM world thoroughly explores issues of power, dependance and responsibility. There is perhaps something to be said for going with the flow. 
On SeekDispline there is one thread about a 21 year old female slave whose 40 year old master does not want children. He has asked her to get sterilised. The thread asks if this is ethical. Some posters think that it is not, as the master could disown the slave in a few months and she would have long term consequences. Other posters say that the whole point of being a slave is to obey the master. One person remarks that these things should be discussed prior to signing a slave contract.
Another thread talks about widening the anus for ease of access by the dominant by introducing incrementally larger butt plugs worn constantly, which are only taken out twice a day for obvious reasons. However at least two slaves witness that they have become permanently incontinent as a result. One of them has to wear nappies but regards this as a perfectly acceptable sacrifice for his mistress.
More information about the responsibilities of being a dom here at the wittily named Wipipedia! Other terms include the more extreme ‘Owner/Property’ and ‘Taken in hand’ all different levels of dominance and submission.

I also learnt a new term: SS BBW. BBW is the acronym for Big Beautiful Woman. SS means Super Size Big Beautiful Woman. I’ve also seen references to ‘thick’ women. Apparently this doesn’t mean that they are stupid, ‘thick’ is used in opposition to ‘thin’. ‘Thick’ means large thighs, arse, but small waist, a fashion pioneered by J-Lo. Is it not strange that women’s bodies change with fashion? One blog suggests that bottoms are getting larger due to the amount of hormones in food.  A ‘thick’ white woman is a rarity. This website ‘assmatrix‘ examines ‘thickness’. Men are never subjected to this kind of pickiness about their physiques. Women really are just a sum of their parts.

Recent posts

Cheap eats in London

October 23, 2025

Blueberry galette recipe

July 14, 2025

High protein recipes: roast tofu block

July 2, 2025

Previous Post: « November Menu
Next Post: Another election »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Animal Disco

    November 10, 2008 at 7:55 am

    Whenever I read about this kind of thing, I always want to know the back stories of the individuals involved. When and why, for example, does it first occur to someone that they want to be a 'slave'? How can they afford all the equipment that must be necessary, let alone all the time they must need to invest in dedicating themselves to their roles? Does love get lost in the administration?

    I'll shut up now, because I'm starting to sound like some sort of BDSM magazine version of Carrie Bradshaw.

    Fascinating stuff.

    Reply
  2. corbin

    November 10, 2008 at 1:17 pm

    Personally the thought of a 24/7 lifestyle
    is just to much for me .
    Now and then to take a holiday and play
    that's fine, just as long as we can go back to
    a relationship of mutual respect in the morning.
    Respect as in caring loving kindness.

    Reply
  3. Animal Disco

    November 10, 2008 at 5:14 pm

    Hmm, more food for thought. When I asked in my first comment when does it occur to someone to be a slave, I should have said occur to be either slave OR master/mistress. Personally I'm far too lazy to be either, and take my pleasures from straightforward, mutual respect. Love, to me, is hard enough to work out without thinking in roles, but I understand that doing so may make the whole emotional minefield much easier to navigate, for some. Is being a female sub a more extreme version/more of the same everyday life? Gosh, I don't think so, but again, I can only talk from a personal perspective. I wouldn't take on task that was repulsive to me to please anybody else. I like pleasing my partner, but it's a two-way deal. Also, I guess we have similar versions of what pleases ourselves and each other – very boringly, a lovely meal, a bottle of wine and a good roll around a very traditional bed – without equipment, I'm afraid! – is pretty much all it takes. But like you, I'm intrigued by the details of all alternatives, and fully respect everybody else's choices – as long as 'choices' genuinely is the operative word here.

    Reply
  4. marmitelover

    November 10, 2008 at 5:20 pm

    I mean in the sense that a sub gets to clean, do chores, laundry, unpaid, all the stuff we normally do!

    Reply
  5. Animal Disco

    November 10, 2008 at 5:52 pm

    I'm rubbish at that stuff too. I'm beginning to wonder why my bf stays…!

    Reply
  6. Ben Emlyn-Jones

    November 10, 2008 at 9:33 pm

    I know a few BBW's myself. Dawn French and Liza Tarbuck come to mind! I'd like them to come to…

    Reply
  7. corbin

    November 24, 2008 at 10:47 pm

    wait a tic maybe these people are just larpers.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Larper

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recipe Rating




Primary Sidebar

MsMarmiteLover aka Kerstin Rodgers.

Chef, photographer, author, journalist, blogger. Pioneer of the supperclub movement.

This is my food and travel blog, with recipes, reviews and travel stories. I also stray into politics, feminism, gardening.

msmarmitelover

My first upholstery project: a nursing rocking cha My first upholstery project: a nursing rocking chair. I used pink toile de jouey fabric and stuffed the seat and back. I used brass tacks. Did a 2 day course at Morley college. I wrote about my love of repair, vintage fabrics on my substack: https://kerstinrodgers.substack.com/p/shoes-fabric-hand-made-craft-repair
Last night made a French onion soup with toasted c Last night made a French onion soup with toasted cheese on top and lots of white wine. Perfect food for zero degrees 🧤🧦🧣❄️recipe: half a dozen brown onions sliced thinly softened in olive oil. 5 cloves garlic crushed and added once the onions are soft. Several fresh bay leaves. 3 vag nope I meant veg stock cubes and 1.5 litres of hot water. 1/3 bottle white wine or a glass of dry sherry. Or both. Simmer for a while then add sourdough bread topped with grated cheese at the end. I used cheddar. Serve hot, sprinkle parsley if you have it and good black pepper. I used kampot black peppercorns. #winterfood #soup #homecooking
I did a private afternoon tea supper club yesterda I did a private afternoon tea supper club yesterday. Thanks to @bro0907 and @imogenrodgersofficial for their help #london #afternoontea #supperclub
I went to a pre Christmas event at @themontgomerie I went to a pre Christmas event at @themontgomeriegarden hotel in Bloomsbury last night. It was hosted by the German tourist board promoting Saxony. I saw mini workshops of crafts from Nuremberg- these little 25 point Moravian paper stars ( each one takes an hour to make), finely whittled & carved wooden Christmas decorations , @meissen_germany porcelain, smoking wooden figurines ( filled with incense, nutcrackers, authentic stollen, Nuremberg ginger bread, white mulled wine and some lovely canapés. Going to try to make a stollen myself. You must always cut it in the middle, so you can put it together so it doesn’t get stale. I found out Colditz, the famous TV drama is in Saxons. I’d love to visit. It all got me in the Christmas mood @visit_germany @visitsaxony_ @visitdresden #christmas #stöllen #germanyinlondon
Making almond chocolate dipped biscotti for Saturd Making almond chocolate dipped biscotti for Saturdays Tea party supper club. Recipe from my tea and baking book Msmarmitelover’s secret tea party. #baking #london #biscotti
At the book launch for Pornocracy by Jo Bartosch w At the book launch for Pornocracy by Jo Bartosch with co-author Robert Jessel speaking, looked on by feminist campaigners Maya Forstater @hiyamayahiya and @fionamcanena of @sexmattersorg . The latter wrote Terf Island. This looks like an Old Master painting. This took place @womensuniversityclub a beautiful private members club in london for women. Historic women who’ve changed the law. Left to right: Robert Jessel, Jo Bartosch, Maya Forstater and Fiona Mcanena. #london #authors #womensrights
On the secret platform of the jubilee line at Char On the secret platform of the jubilee line at Charing Cross, now disused, we were treated to a fabulous cheese inspired fashion show by the fashion students of @ualfoundation and @3ddafoundation The cheeses featured were cantal, comté, tomme de savoie, saint nectaire, fourme d’ambert, époisses, Brills-savaging, Camembert, Brie and langres. The outfits were so creative and deeply researched by the designers. @thecheeseexplorer explained that during the tastings, some designers had never tasted those cheeses before. Anglo French @tatty_macleod came and is one of the judges. It was surreal and fun. Afterwards we were treated to a groaning cheese platter table at the bottom of the escalators. Then I joined the commuters of the london tube journeying home. Food and fashion are often opposed: to be fashionable you must not eat. This turns it on its head. @hopscotch_season #london #cheese #fashionandfood #cheesesoffrance
Sunday lunch autumn vibes: munchkin pumpkin blue c Sunday lunch autumn vibes: munchkin pumpkin blue cheese soufflés; baked fish stuffed with dates ( an adaptation of @ghilliebasan’s recipe in The Moroccan cookbook) with couscous and almonds; roast potatoes, carrots with preserved bergamot: mile high filo pear pie: open fire and candles and family #cooking #family #london #sundaylunch
Took Ophelia @ophelia.rose.2022 to @kenwood_house_ Took Ophelia @ophelia.rose.2022 to @kenwood_house_hampstead_heath for the Halloween trail. It was a little bit scary & I had to shoot & hold her hand at the same time. It’s a lit trail around the gardens and house with food, performances and set pieces. #grandma #london #outings #grandmacore #halloween #thingstodoinlondon
my latest substack post https://kerstinrodgers.sub my latest substack post https://kerstinrodgers.substack.com/p/rad-fems-by-the-seaside-filia-25 on attending the Filia feminist conference in Brighton. It was full of controversy: violent protests by trans activists, splits between feminists over anti-semitism. Also talks on surrogacy with testimony, on the Spy Cops case where women were deceived into long term relationships by married undercover cops, plus my observations of the conference.
Just had this window built by @odgjoinery and stai Just had this window built by @odgjoinery and stained glass window to match the front door by @wstoneglass beautiful work. Thank you so much. #edwardianhouse #victorianhome #stainedglass #joinery #restoration #london #kilburn
Stuffed peppers: filled with soaked fine bulgur wh Stuffed peppers: filled with soaked fine bulgur wheat, hazelnuts, sherry soaked sultanas, preserved lemon, smoky paprika, garlic, dill, coriander leaves , mint, and ground seeds, cumin,pumpkin seeds baked in the oven for 45 minutes. Serve with yoghurt. Delish! #latesummer #recipe #vegetarian #vegan #middleeasternish
My book Msmarmitelover’s secret tea party is now a My book Msmarmitelover’s secret tea party is now available on @ckbk which is like Spotify for cookbooks - check it out or buy a signed copy from my website #afternoonteaparty
Next door there are 2 damson trees in the grounds Next door there are 2 damson trees in the grounds of the council flats. The ground smelled like jam. I picked a few kilos, 3 kilos after sorting through. I put them, crushed, stones included, in a clean glass container, with 1.5 kilos of sugar and 2 litres of gin ( I may add another), I’ll leave them for 3/4 weeks then filter. Damson gin for Christmas.
Fig, chocolate and chestnut tart- recipe in my boo Fig, chocolate and chestnut tart- recipe in my book Msmarmitelover’s secret tea party. This is rather adult, using bitter dark chocolate ganache, chestnut flour and figs from my garden. #figrecipes #chocolate #baking
Went for an evening of Turkish music and entertain Went for an evening of Turkish music and entertainment @kibele.london Fantastic margarita cocktails, great food, generous portions and wonderful entertainment. In the end we all got up and had a go at belly dancing, #turkishfood #london #londonnights
I’ve got Covid (day3) so not much food in the hous I’ve got Covid (day3) so not much food in the house. I found some floppy- going black- carrots in the salad drawer, so I peeled and resuscitated those. Chopped them into a saucepan with a couple of cubes of vegetable stock and a litre of hot water. Then I added a couple of tablespoons of smooth peanut butter, a clove of garlic, 1 tsp of ground cumin, half a preserved lemon. Just stuff I had around. Simmered till the carrots were soft then blended in the @vitamixuk I can honestly say the vitamix is my most regularly used bit of kitchen kit. Anyway- hey presto- a high protein soup with fibre. I hope I test negative before I totally run out of food. #solo #covid #highprotein #soup
I wrote this long read for @scotnational about the I wrote this long read for @scotnational about the anti G8 camp in Stirling to protest against the G8 in Gleneagles. I partipated in the camp & protest along with my daughter @siennamarla playing in the samba band, part of the Pink Bloc. The camp was an incredible experience- the possibility of a different type of politics, of horizontal democracy. It was also a lot of fun. But our protest was tragically overshadowed by the 7/7 bombings in London. We wanted to create a new world but by the actions of a few disaffected British Muslim terrorists our positive movement for change was drowned out by hideous violence against normal ordinary people. Here is my account. 20 years anniversary #7/7 #londonbombings #scotland #antig8 #protest #gleneagles
Cheap stuff. Since the pandemic money has been tig Cheap stuff. Since the pandemic money has been tight. I shop at Lidl and aldi for food, Vinted, Portobello and Primark for clothes. The first pic is gazpacho with a banderilla from Lidl. They often have Spanish weeks and other nationality foods at a bargain price. I love those huge cartons of gazpacho- I glug it down like juice, especially in the heat. The banderillas are sold by the jar. Second pic is me in a primark vest, cardi, with an Anthropologie sale belt and old denim shorts from 10 years ago. Sorry about the mess behind, I sold a piece of furniture, a desk I found on the street, painted enamel green with ‘bamboo’brass handles which I sold on eBay for £225 #needsmust #thrift
My tea book Msmarmitelover’s secret tea party is n My tea book Msmarmitelover’s secret tea party is now out on the cookbook app @ckbk it’s now out of print but you can still buy some print copies via me or Amazon. However you can see all the recipes ( like my sour cherry icecream which I served last week) on this site which is like a Spotify for cooks. Arguably afternoon tea is a meal which the English do better than any other country. #cookbooks #afternoontea #supperclubs
Follow on Instagram

Archives

Copyright © 2025 msmarmitelover